Emotions

Well my mom underwent her 3^rd “free-flap” surgery yesterday.  A year ago in November & December she underwent her 1^st & 2^nd “fibular free-flap” surgery.  Yesterday, she underwent a similar procedure however this time bone, skin and tissue was taken from her left hip.  They were not able to do the implants for the dental posts at this time.  It was a long surgical procedure 10-12 hours.  She did not get out of recovery until around 9pm.  Today she is in the Surgical Intensive Care Unit (S.I.C.U.).  I have to say out of all the times I’ve been in/on this unit it did not bother me.  Today, however, I am overcome with emotions.  I am scared, sad, worried, and nervous among the many feelings.  There are so many bells, whistles and lights.  You would think that this is suppose to be a quiet place, but it’s chaotic and noisy.  There was a gentleman in there this morning almost directly across from her bed, and he was playing some soft music on his acoustic guitar, which was somewhat comforting.

I don’t want to say that she (my mom) looks good, because how can anyone in the SICU look good?  She looks horrible.  Her face is swollen, she has all kinds of tubes coming out of everywhere.  Every time they poke inside her mouth I get really nervous.  I know that they are looking for it to bleed.  At one point they (the residents) were poking around in her mouth and began to walk away.  When dad & I asked “how’s it look?”, they replied “that’s why were calling Dr. Urken”.  To me that sends up a red flag, to me that says it’s not doing bleeding.  Oh!! How I am beginning to hate this routine.  The new flap is purple in color.  On two different occasions they used leeches on the “purple” skin.  Within minutes of using the leeches the skin began to turn pink in color.  How amazing that a small little creature that we seem to fear can be used in such a medically amazing way.  I found it to be fascinating to watch.  Once they (the leech) has had his/her fill of blood, they become sleepy and fall off.  It reminds me of “tryptophan” for humans.  We left her around 8:30 so she can get some rest, she needs all that she can get. 

It’s really snowing hard here in NYC and there has also been some thunder and lighting.   Something I’ve never witnessed or at least can’t remember seeing in the middle of a snow storm.  Crazy how nature works.  Crazy how anything works.

Another Day of Waiting

I can’t believe that the first month of the New Year is already almost over.  Where does the time go?  I had planned on writing on the blog almost daily as a New Years Resolution.  However, as you can see that I have not done so.  Why do I bother making such resolutions anyway?  I can almost never keep them; actually I can NEVER keep them.  I do well for the first few weeks, and then I fall off the so-called bandwagon.  It just seems that life gets busy and I don’t have time.  Before you know it I will be back in school and my time will again be very limited for leisurely activity.

On 1/14/11 I finished the first of 4 Clinicals for the Occupational Therapy program.  I completed two weeks for my level I Fieldwork at an outpatient hand therapy clinic.  I absolutely loved it and think that I am going to pursue Hand Therapy.  I have kind of been thinking about it for a few years, but after spending two weeks in a Hand Therapy Clinic, I’ve made up my mind.  I am kicking myself in the ASS though, because I should’ve chosen this setting for my 12 week affiliate.  Oh!! Well, You live and learn I guess.

Just a few short days ago, I returned to the UC campus to get another semester underway.  I am excited, but again very anxious.  I don’t look forward to all the long hours of homework and studying.  I know it will all be well worth it in the end, but I hate all those long hours.  I guess you can’t have your cake and eat it too right.  It looks like we’ll have a lot of assignments to do, but for some reason I don’t think it will be as overwhelming as last semester. Maybe, that is because my one class last semester was a lot of busy work.  I hate busy work.

I got some great news in the mail on Friday 1/14/11, I made the Dean’s Honor List at UC.  I’ve never been on the Dean’s List before, so this is quite and accomplishment for me.  I admit I worked really hard for this.  I hope that I can maintain it and possibly graduate with high honors.  That would be great!!  It will also show all of those teachers who long ago told me that I was not college material.  As Toby Keith says in his song “How do you like me now?”  Hehehe!!!

On this snowy morning in NYC, as I sit here writing this blog, my mom is in pre-admissions getting ready to undergo yet another 10-12 hour surgery.  If I could have taken her place I would have done so in a heartbeat.  She as endured so much pain, heartache and disappointments over many years.  She is such a wonderful woman and deserves the BEST of everything.  I’ve come to accept that Beth Israel Medical Center and Gillman Hall are our home away from home.  We’ve spent so many days/nights here over the 14 months.  Even the doorman “Jimmy” at Gillman Hall considers us family.  He would do anything for us and always goes out of his way to help us out.  What a great guy.

I must prepare for a long day of waiting…….

'Tis The Season

What a wonderful holiday season this is going to be. This is by far my favorite time of year.  No, not because there are presents involved, but because I get to spend it with my family who I love very dearly. This year we are home to celebrate the holidays.  

I got the house all decorated and ready for the season, however it is not fully decked out as past years.  It just seams as though the holiday sneaked up on us really quickly. I did not put up any outside lights at all.  Oh!! Well.  My mom helped me out this year quite a bit. After I put the tree together (yes it's fake) she decorated 90% of the tree.  I put the final touches on -the garland & beads.  I have to admit it looks so pretty.  Even the cats love it.  They sit under it all the time.  I think they are eating some of the garland too!!! I keep finding small pieces on the floor.

We have so many decorations for the tree, not your ordinary bulbs!!! Most have a special meaning.  There are characters, snowmen, angles, and little critters.  Ornaments that we have collected over the years.  Thanks to Hallmark!! Hee hee!

Today, mom and I did some Christmas Shopping!!! I can finally say that I am just about done.  I have only one or two more items to purchase.  It was fun shopping with mom, we haven't done that in so long.  She still got very tired but we did as much as we could.  She was on a mission to find some nice stationary, however I guess nobody writes letters as they once did.  This just goes to show you how technological our times have become.  It's all email, facebook or texting.  So needless to say, we came home without the stationary.

When we got home I did some wrapping.  I am by far done, but at least I have a good start.  I put on my annual tradition "A Chipmunk Christmas", poured some wine and did my wrapping.

I am so excited for everyone to see what I got them!!! This is why I love Christmas.  I love making my family happy and I think I did pretty good this year with the selection of gifts. 

 It's the countdown to Christmas!!! 

A Truly Blessed Day!

Today we celebrate a wonderful Thanksgiving.  It was a really nice day, quite in-fact.  It was just myself, mom and dad.  There were many phone calls received and made today -as there is every year.  I set my alarm clock for 8am, however the alarm went off,  and I dozed back off to sleep.  I finally got out of bed around 9am.  


Jo called shortly after I got up to tell us that she is a grandmother again.  Little Mario arrived yesterday evening. : } .  Mom and baby are doing well. I miss seeing Danny, Jo and their family.  They are my second family and we used to see them quite often. 


 I talked to my brother Mikey as I do on every major Holiday and Birthday. He sounds like he is doing well for himself.  He said that he might be losing is job, as the owner of the restaurant is having some difficulty with the landlord.  I hope that she will be able to stay open, especially through the holiday season.   there's nothing worse than losing your job during the holidays.


I made my usual staples -corn casserole and broccoli casserole.  They both got a little overdone, but that's ok.  The turkey took a little longer than usual this year.  It just did not want to cook I guess. I had the annual Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade on while I began to prepare the feast.  I love at least listening to the parade.  I know now that the official start of the Holiday Season has begun. 


This afternoon, even though it's a holiday I still had to address the homework issue.  I did all my online discussion posts, finished my self-assessment assignment and began the activity analysis.  Now I am having trouble getting back into the groove.  I am just tired, but I know that I need to do a little bit more. We just have so many assignments due before next Friday night 12/3.


We finally ate dinner around 5:30pm, not our traditional time of 3:00pm, but the fact that we were together and not down in NYC or even on our way home, is a blessing in it self.  We are home for the holidays and have each other. That's what it means to be truly Thankful.

Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!

My First Blog Entry

So, I've never done this before, and I thought that I would give it a try. I have a lot to say. However I won't spill all my secrets here, but at least I can give you an idea of who I am and what I am thinking.


Well today, we had our first snow fall.  I thought they said rain all day with scattered snow showers in the higher elevations and mountains.  I don't live in the mountains and we still got about an 1" of snow.  It was very pretty to look at through the window of our therapy gym today. However, I was not prepared for the snow.  I did not even put the snow brush in the car yet.  Good thing it was not more than an inch.


The trees looked so pretty with a fresh coat of snow on the branches.  As I was driving home, at the 5 O'Clock hour all the headlights and tail lights helped to make the trees glisten with snow.  It really got me in the mood for the holidays.  I became excited with joy, thinking it will be time soon to begin my Christmas shopping.  Heck, why not, they all ready started playing Christmas music on some of the radio stations 24/7 as of Nov. 1.


It's funny, because normally I hate the snow.  But, for some reason today it made me feel warm inside and excited about the upcoming season.  I do worry though because we still have many, many leave on all the trees around here.  I don't ever remember the trees having so many leaves at this time of year.  


Well I have to get back to the old school work.  I am in the home stretch for the semester and have to facilitate a discussion group this week.  Ughh!!! So, first I must find an interesting article, read it and then I can begin the discussion. 


Let the search begin.............